January 1st is the mother of all Mondays.
Let me explain...
On any given Monday throughout the year one million pretty girls wake up and say "today is the day that I am going to...
- Cut out junk food
- Start going to the gym
- Floss my teeth
- Stop dating dickheads
The list goes on. Monday represents another chance to change our lives, to lose 5kgs or give ourselves the best chance of finding the perfect guy.
And then on any given Friday throughout the year one million pretty girls go to bed thinking...
- HOW THE FUCK DID THAT ENTIRE PIZZA FIND ITS WAY INTO MY MOUTH?
- HOW THE FUCK DID MY EX BOYFRIEND FIND HIS WAY INTO MY BED?
- WHO THE FUCK HAS TIME TO FLOSS ANYWAY?
By the time Sunday rolls around we come to the conclusion that we're only human and Monday is the perfect chance to start again and the perfect excuse to binge eat for the rest of Sunday.
January 1st is the mother of all Mondays because it symbolises a fresh new beginning. The chance to leave all of the failed attempts to make yourself a better person in the previous year and really give it your all.
The problem with starting fresh on New years day is that when January 1st actually rolls around you're unlikely to wake up feeling fresh.
Every year I make a new years resolution and every year I wake up on January 1st and break it. Let's face it, although January 1st is the start of a new year it's also the middle of the silly season so we're practically doomed before we even begin.
This year as per usual I woke up on some strangers couch with no pants, desert mouth and glitter in my eyes. The first thing I thought was not "hello 2014! lets go for a long sweaty run followed by a acai bowl" it was "If there is a 2L bottle of Lift in the fridge right now I'm going to run out onto the street a kiss a hobo".
As soon as that bottle of sugary goodness hits my lips I'm a failure. Soft drink is not paleo, cave men did not drink Lift and therefore the promise I made to myself to start clean eating in 2014 has already been broken merely five hours into the New Year.
And cue the self loathing. The feeling is far worse than committing to becoming a vegetarian on Monday and accidentally eating a slab of bacon on Tuesday morning. By caving in on the first few days of January you've set the tone for the year. Yep, thats right I might as well give up now because its going to be another 365 days before I get the chance to really truly start fresh again.
Well ladies I think that we should once and for all cut out this stupid irrational mentally unstable way of thinking. You can achieve your goals and fulfil your new years resolutions you just need to begin when you are ready!
After 2 weeks of solid binge drinking I can finally say that I am ready to grab 2014 by the balls and make him my bitch.
As of tomorrow I'm going to really give this Paleo thing a shot (as that was my new years resolution in the first place).
And if you were a failure like me in the first few days of January 2014, I want you to think about starting again tomorrow.
There is a reason why spare tires, prenups and plan B's exist and thats because we all need a back up from time to time. Yeah tomorrow might not be January 1st "the ultimate day to change the rest of your life" but it is a brand new day.
Now that we've all promised to start fresh tomorrow I'm going to celebrate with 'the last supper', a cheese and spaghetti toasted sandwich, a hand full of chocolate coated almonds and a cup of custard...and ice-cream...with ice magic.
#fitspo here I come!
No comments:
Post a Comment